Your reading this again

Why? Why are you reading this? Seriously do you think that my words will actually benefit you in any way shape or form? Why yes they will, they will greatly enhance your life as you know it. Follow me, and like Jesus, I will die! Wait no, follow me and I shall give you all a little piece of my mind, not that I would like to. But you can have it none the less, a tiny piece just for you, I will even gift wrap it just so you won't whine about how small it is. So you have made it this far, well done, you may rest for 36.4 years before carrying on, nahh just kidding you will be dead by then, yes dead, the world will end 6 and a half minutes after you read this, no matter when you do, 6 and a half minutes. So, after your rest come back and the internet will be gone because of giant internet eating space giraffes that dislike the colour orange. Just one more question, I can see you, can you see me?

I do like the colour of your curtains...